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Joe Cillo

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VIEW FROM ACROSS THE POND: DOGS ARE FAMILY

By Joe Cillo

MY FAMILY, MY DOG

There is no psychiatrist in the world
Like a puppy licking your face.
Ben Williams

 

When Daphne sits on my lap, my blood pressure drops 30 points.  Why bother with Lipitor?  Daphne is not dispensed to me by a pharmacist although she is definitely good medicine. She is a five-pound Chihuahua with blue eyes and an attitude.  However, when she sits on MY lap, her blood pressure elevates…and no wonder.  She is at work; she is doing her job.

Daphne’s mother dresses her in high fashion: ruffled skirts with matching knickers and booties, a warm hoodie to wear when she and her mum are on the slopes and a bright strawberry vest to welcome spring.

Daphne has a stubborn anal gland that does not process her food properly and her mother has spent hundreds, nay, thousands of pounds on Daphne’s alimentary canal, to no avail.  At last, her mother resorted to holistic remedies and feeds Daphne a nightly soupcon of pumpkin and rice to soothe her aching bottom.

Daphne is well aware of her privileged position in the family.  She dines with us at our table.  We do not consider her germs as lethal as those of her former daddy or all her cousins…some with four legs, some with only two.   We all know her preferences and we do our best to keep her as happy as her presence makes us.  She does not like the rain; she considers walking on the other end of a leash demeaning; she loves to watch movies and never so much as woofs lest she disturb the others watching with her.  We know that Daphne is absorbing the action on the screen because she often weeps at a sad ending, and she still wails when she remembers what happened to poor Jackie Robinson.

We who know and love Daphne think she is unique but it appears that she is no different than any other dog in any other home anywhere in the world.  One look at her stimulates human oxytocin, a bonding hormone that increases our trust and attachment to those close to us and makes us suspicious of strangers.  The fact is that the longer Daphne stares at me, the more I love her and want to shoot that yapping little dachshund next door. This explains why we think nothing of spending half our wages on Daphne’s attire, rushing her to a doctor at the slightest hint that she is not in perfect health even as we ignore our own coughs, tummy spasms and exploding lungs. She is far more than part of our family…she is the very adhesive that keeps us together. For, although we all  have spats with one another over toilet seats left up or down, toothpaste tubes squeezed wrong and dishes unwashed, we all unite in our love for Daphne.  It is she who keeps us human.

Percy is a Corgi without a tail.  He stares at me with the same intensity Jewish men look at me.  You know: something is missing and he doesn’t remember how he lost it.  The interesting thing is that the more Percy stares at me, the more I adore him.  I cannot say the same for Jewish men.

Dorothy is a shih’ Tzu with a raging metabolism. When she sits on your lap, you can feel the heat of her tiny little body warm you right to your toes. When her blood pumps through her veins and burns her calories you will swear the house is on fire.  Dorothy’s mother says she has saved 1000 pounds a year on heating bills and her only cost is dog food.  That, after all, is Dorothy’s fuel and it is a lot cheaper than petrol.

 

Dogs are miracles with paws.
Susan Kennedy

 

VIEW FROM ACROSS THEPOND: DIRT

By Joe Cillo

DIRT

Dirt gets no respect.
My boyfriend

More than 1 in 12 deaths are caused by the dirt we breathe.  Man made particles are clogging up the air and getting into our lungs and our bloodstreams.  Indeed, they are messing up our health and threatening our environment.

But what can we do?  We have to breathe and manufacturers need to make filthy engines to run our lives.  Sometimes we need to compromise our values in the name of progress. I believe a filthy life is worth the risk.

We need to experience a certain amount of dirt so we can recognize clean.  My gran ate a mud pie every morning until she was 10 years old.  “Sometimes I added a bit of tree bark for flavor and once in a while a cricket to give it crunch,” she said. ”My mother never knew because I snuck one in right after my morning dump, but she did ask uncomfortable questions when my teeth got a funny tinge.   We didn’t have whiteners in my day.”

My gran lived to 110 and on her death-bed she begged for a bit of dirt with her last breath.  We fed her two dust bunnies and a clump of sod from her African violet and she left us with a smile on her face.

Pregnant women in Wales craved coal to eat with the same intensity that New York mothers-to-be ached for a dill pickle.  Babies born in Wales showed no ill effects from their mothers’ blackened diets.  Indeed, Welsh choirs often attribute the purity of their tone to the anthracite in their systems.

I believe we are depriving ourselves of the very essence of life with our determination to purify everything we touch, breathe or feel.  An apple with the film of air, dust and insects nesting on their skins has twice the flavor of one tossed and whirled in a sanitizing bath of disinfectant and wiped with a sterile cloth.  A hand roughened by the soil of the day has far more warmth than one damp and sticky with hand cleaner that reeks of disinfectant.

Even natural human reproduction from conception to birth is riddled with mess, drippings and germs.  I, for one, prefer the old fashioned way to sanitary lab controlled in vitro procedures. If the cost of passion is a bit of risk and a possible germ, I am up for it.

Down and dirty is the way to go if you are to experience the lust and excitement of a rich full life.  If you are afraid of foreign objects compromising your health, you are doomed to a life filled with fear and your every moment will be preoccupied with prevention.  A clean germ free life is bland, boring and repetitive. To me, soap and disinfectants are for cowards. I’ll take my chances on the  feel of an unwashed handshake or the warmth of an unsanitary cuddle. They are so worth the risk.

 

 

 

VIEW FROM ACROSS THE POND

By Joe Cillo

BLUSHING

Blushing is the color of virtue.
Diogenes

Blushing has gone out of style and I think that is a terrible loss.  There is no better way of reading between the lines than to check the degree of rosiness on another’s face.   My mother could tell in an instant if I had eaten that chocolate bar, stolen the car keys or missed a period.  All she had to do is say “What are you doing?” and look at me when I answered  “Worrying about the state of the world.”  or “Trying to figure out what to get you for your birthday.”

I would always get a retort like “No dessert tonight,” or “I am calling your probation officer.”  My mother was one smart cookie. She always knew better.

Blushing was one of the best communicators we had in the old days.  For example, if you looked in your wallet and several bills were missing, you could look your partner in the eye and say, “Funny, I can’t seem to find the cash for that holistic medical procedure we discussed.” One look told you that he spent it all on fish and chips. (It is always a he…women use less obvious tactics).

When I taught primary school, blushing was the key to figuring out which kid stole my purse and which one was smoking something in the halls. I do not know how teachers cope today when nothing embarrasses anyone and everyone has the Internet for retaliation.   Nowadays, our children do not color up when they are naughty.  They either post their remarks on face book with a filthy picture or tweet their fury with a lot of hash tags.

People are no longer shocked.  We used to blush if our skirts blew over our heads in a strong wind.  Now, we remember to wear lacey underwear in case someone sitting on the floor looks up. That is why wax jobs have become primary grooming tools. Cleavage has become an advertising tool for the ladies, to say nothing of very tight underwear for the male population.  Women no long have to wonder what seven inches looks like.  All they have to do is look.

I am all for accepting who we are and what we do, but I think it is sad that we have lost our sense of shame.  It is actually very sweet to kiss someone unexpectedly and have him blush with surprise.  It has become a lost technique to take someone’s hand, look into his eyes and say I KNOW what you are thinking.” If that person turned red you knew he had the same thing on his mind that you did.

That kind of subtlety has gone out of style.  Now, you take a selfie of your private parts, post it on Tinder and hope for the best.

 

VIEW FROM ACROSS THE POND

By Joe Cillo

BEST DIGS EVER

If you want total security, go to prison…..
Dwight D. Eisenhower

I have always wanted to be daring and do something absolutely outrageous…but the truth is I fear the punishment.  I have read horror stories of what happens in prisons: brutality, rape, lousy plumbing…and I want none of it.  However, I am in the unenviable position of losing my house because it is under water and I am looking around for affordable housing for my declining years.  Unfortunately, the only shelter that is “affordable” for me on my pension is a used Yurt in the Andes or an abandoned cave in New Mexico.

Imagine my delight when I discovered the Maconochie Center, a prison in Canberra, Australia specifically designed to pamper lawbreakers with so much smother love that they realize the only way to have little fun is to obey the law and get out on parole.  The philosophy at Maconochie is that if you give love, you will receive it. I think that is a wonderful attitude.  It didn’t work for me with my two husbands, but it has been overwhelmingly successful with my dog.

The “guards” at the prison (called service providers) refer to the inmates as customers and do their best to give the darlings in their care whatever will make them feel wanted and secure.    If one of their customers is feeling a bit depressed, why not cheer him up with a couple gin and tonics, a shot of heroin and a little sniff of cocaine.  Whatever works as they say in the trade.

The residents at Maconochie Center live together in five bedroom cottages.  There is never a problem if a rapist cannot get along with the guy who strangled his baby.  Maconochie Center has mediators on call to help the boys (you KNOW they are boys) settle their differences.  Perhaps one of them needs a long walk in the country…where there are willing sheep?  Perhaps the other needs apple pie a la mode?  Who knows?  The staff at the center are there to help.

It sounds like a very fun place to live for me.   All I would have to do is grow a bit of cannabis in my yard before my foreclosure and sell it in a schoolyard.  If I wanted to be certain I could stay at this lovely place for the rest of my life (and after all, I am 81 years old.  How long can that be?)  I would have to toss someone around screaming “I am going to kill you!”  My mother said that to me often enough.  I know I can be convincing.  The good news is that I don’t actually have to plunge the knife into anyone’s heart…all I need to do in Australia is make the judge believe I really meant to do the deed.

The weather in Canberra is perfect for me.  You get four seasons, none too hot or too cold and at Maconochie there are endless opportunities to explore the outdoors.  I can use my computer at all hours and if I have a severe pain, I can get a prescription strong enough to use for recreation after the pain has disappeared.  But the best news of all is that there has been a rash of pregnancies at the center since it opened.  Why, I could finally have that baby I always wanted and not have to worry about dealing with the little sweetheart when it becomes a teenager.  By that time I will be long gone and the Maconochie service providers can take over.

 

 

 

VIEW FROM ACROSS THE POND

By Joe Cillo

BE GOOD TO YOUR PARENTS….OR ELSE!

Appreciating your parents is the only hope for civilization.
The Chinese Government & Lynn Ruth

China has decided it is a punishable crime for adult children to neglect their parents and I think that is a very wise decision. Wouldn’t it be wonderful for us all, if every nation followed suit?

It is about time someone took steps to stop the shameless way grown progeny are treating their parents these days. Elderly parents sit at home in their wheel chairs or on the sofa, counting the moments ‘til one of their offspring remembers that they are too weak and tired to get to Tesco’s; the hours tick by, their tummies gurgle, their heads ache and they stare at the door, praying it will open and the heir to their estate will appear bearing bubble and squeak and even a bit of pudding.

After all, parents have every right to expect their children to be there for them. Didn’t they clean up Junior when he got a bloody nose?  Didn’t they give their little princess dancing lessons so she could express her inner feelings? They let her get that disgusting tattoo of Frankenstein chewing a bunny and they never said a word when she appeared at the breakfast table, her hair dyed purple and three rings in her nose.

And that was before they became teen-agers.

They looked the other way, when their little darlings sold pot to the neighborhood grade-school kids, and the countless times they threw up on the couch from an overdose or got too affectionate with one another.  Remember that?

Didn’t they sacrifice that extra cruise, and the trip to see penguins copulate on an iceberg just so their son could go to university and their daughter could afford that abortion?  Of course they did.

And that is why the Chinese Government decided to step up to the plate and remind us that we owe Mummy and Daddy big time.  They were the ones who kept us alive through the bullying, the bike accidents, the shattered limbs and broken hearts.  Now, it is the children’s turn to keep their parents comfy and warm ‘til they breathe their last.  After all, there is always time to change the will, if they feel unloved.

Not that it will be easy if the law becomes universal. Take Mary Louise:  There she is galloping though her day, getting the kids to school, packing their lunches, rushing off to the office, picking up her darlings, and taking them to tap dancing and soccer, driving home, giving the house a quick dust, fixing dinner, greeting the father of her gang with a drink, serving food, cleaning the kitchen and collapsing in front of the telly.  At midnight, she and her hubby stagger up to bed, too exhausted to do what they used to do before they tied the knot. Suddenly, she sits bolt upright, snaps her fingers and says, “OH MY GOD!!!  I forgot to visit Daddy.  Now, we’ll never pay off this mortgage.”

And if her partner is a good sort, he says, “Don’t worry darling. I will visit you every Tuesday and bring chocolate.”

View from Across the Pond

By Joe Cillo

REMEMBER ME?

Look back and smile on perils past.
Walter Scott

It happens every day.  You open Facebook and find some forgotten person from long ago. My friend Barry re-discovered Gloria, his high school sweetheart there.  They both had been widowed the year before and…well, you know the rest.  They are now madly in love spending hot and heavy weekends together reminiscing about that lousy math teach who drove everyone crazy and the big mistake they made marrying someone else first.

I have not been so lucky.  The people who re-connect with me on Facebook are all part of a nightmare I prefer to erase.  They remind me that they knew me when I wore braces on my teeth and wandered through life with my head in a cloud, my feet encased in orthopedic oxfords.  I do not want to relive a time when I was ruled by parents, teachers and consensus.  Those days are past.

I can only suspect that the ones who contact me are so senile they do not remember anything more than my name. There could be no other reason.  I was not the hottest item on the block in days gone by.

Nonetheless, I fell in love with the unattainable on a regular basis and went to great lengths to let my targets know I was available.  When I look back on all of them now, I realize how desperate I was. Did I really want that short, pimply guy in my history class?  And why did my heart flutter at the sight of a boy in uniform.  Didn’t I realize that clothes cannot transform a boy into a man?

Not long ago, I got a friend request from Donny Okun who fancied me when I was nineteen and still hopeful. He was a sailor then who wore his bell-bottom trousers tight enough so I could see clearly what he had to offer. He sent me bouquets of roses every week for a month and then asked me to come with him to Canada for a night on the town.

OMG!  I was crossing the border with an honest-to-god sailor and you know what they say about sailors!!!  I threw caution to the winds and wore my most décolleté dress so he could see my equipment as clearly as I could see his.  We got in the car, I lit a cigarette and tossed the match out the window.

However, the window was closed and the flaming match ricocheted into my cleavage.  As both of us burrowed into my dress to keep me from bursting into flame, I realized all too clearly that I needed more than a pair of tight trousers to commit.

And now, this guy wants us to be friends?

I hit delete.  It was one of the wisest decisions I have ever made.

 

VIEWS FROM ACROSS THE POND

By Joe Cillo

ART IS GOING TO THE APES

An ape cannot speak about his art
Anymore than a monkey can discuss a his digestion.
Jacques Cocteau and Lynn Ruth

In the late sixties, a gorilla won the Modern Art competition at the Detroit Museum of Art. The animals’ owner put several tubes of paint and a blank canvas in the ape’s cage.  The furry artist, whom I shall call Sybil, stomped on the tubes of paint and smeared the colors on the canvas with her paws.  After an hour, she tired of dancing and began eating the tubes of paint.  Her owner pulled the canvas out of her cage, hosed Sybil down and was amazed at the finished canvas.   It reminded him of a combination of a Jackson Pollack with a smattering of Kandinsky, a dash of Picasso and traces of Klee.  When Sybil’s masterpiece dried, he varnished it, framed it and entered it in the museum’s competition.

To his delight, the painting won first prize.  He bought a jeweled collar for Sybil, pinned a pink ribbon in her hair and brought her to the award ceremony. It was a little dicey getting her in the front door  but the owner insisted she was a service animal  He managed to keep her from molesting the guests by feeding her bananas and bit of cadmium red. When they called his name to accept the award, Sybil joined him on stage.  He told the astounded judges that it was not he who created the masterpiece they so admired.  It was his Sybil.

Years later, I took a class with the fabulously talented realistic painter Joseph Sheppard and he told me that Sybil was indeed a magnificent talent.  Indeed, he had joined her in her cage a few years after her triumph to raise money for the museum.  Together they painted a still life that hangs now in that same museum.

Evidently, gorillas not only paint, but they know what they are painting. Sister and brother gorillas Michael and Koko were taught sign language.  As a result, Koko (the artist in the family) was able to explain to her curator Dr. Penny Patterson, that she had painted a bird.

Just this past month, word is out that a zoo in North Dakota is selling the artwork of its 275 pound orangutan named Tal. His paintings are so colorful that they literally fly off the wall.  The animal’s favorite color is yellow and often he eats as much of the paint as he smears on his canvases. “Could be because it looks like a banana,” said the zoo’s curator.

There is no doubt that creativity is fundamental in the ape psyche. The animals  love using crayons, pencils and finger paint although they prefer oils they can eat. Everyone knows that children have the same propensity to eat the colors they use to paint. I believe we can learn a lot from the apes and their ability to transform their creative efforts into funds that support their favorite institutions.  I propose that we exhibit and sell all the paintings from local kindergarten classes to pay for amenities in their schools.  Think of it! We would no longer have to pay taxes to support education!  Our kindergartners would finance the system for us…and who knows?  There might be enough money left to reward the young artists with a few bananas.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

VIEWS FROM ACROSS THE POND

By Joe Cillo

ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

Politeness; The most acceptable hypocrisy.
Ambrose Bierce

British men are the politest animals in the universe.  The first thing they ask you is “Are you all right?” and, if you are an innocent, you believe they really want to know. They seem so caring, so mild, so…so sweet.  But underneath that proper façade, lurks suppressed anger, aggression and hatred boiling about, absolutely aching to let off steam.  Just ask any woman over 14.  She knows.  She has seen it.  She has defended herself against it. And she has won.

Obviously, male testosterone and animal aggression are at an all time high universally in this century.  In Spain, chastity belts are a way of life. In Greece,…well…we all know what those men do to a woman. In Britain, however all that hormonal activity  is repressed and re-channeled.

That is why the crime rate for men in Britain has plummeted.  The male Brit is simply too proper for confrontation. In the UK, the very idea of murder is terribly upsetting. It is so messy.  The thought of assaulting someone on the street is repugnant to a real gentleman (and we all KNOW how correct an Englishman must appear).  It might stain your shirt or even worse…leave a bruise.

Every woman in a heterosexual partnership can testify to the passive–aggressive garbage they must ignore every day (for they too are very PC.)  For example, it is a well-known fact that a man will always call you darling before he hits you.  Always.  It is the way it is done.

The truth is that any fellow who is British in bed, will always apologize and we women know why. We watch pornography, too.   In fact, although the maternal instinct is very strong, most women would prefer that their partner was not present at the conception of their children.  They always hope for a French intervention…or even an Italian one.  Those men don’t bother with protocol.  They just get in there and get the job done.

No full-blooded Englishman ever actually leaves his wife. That explains those tortuous 40-year alliances that drag on and on plodding through rearing the children, indulging the grand kids and going on cruises to ease the boredom of it all.   A real Englishman stays with his spouse and ignores for her for so long, that she is forced to leave to preserve her sanity.  Clever fellows!  That is how THEY become the injured one.

Besides, as every male knows, it is foolhardy to walk out of a partnership until he has found himself a proper house cleaner and a hot young thing for recreation.

The fact is that English MEN have a sense of entitlement that women must accept.  They get it from their mothers.  They know how to push the right buttons to make women and children indulge them and juries excuse their behavior.

The buttons they push these days are on their smart phones and their I-pads.  Men in this country are addicted to online bullying and misanthropic tweeting. It doesn’t leave a scar.  It is not unusual for a hard working woman, to slave away for 8 hours at the office, gallop to Lidl (she knows where to find the bargains) on the way home, Hoover the house as she charges through it to the kitchen to make a healthy stir fry for the children while her partner is belching quietly and watching television in the parlor, scratching his private parts.  As she tosses the pasta into the drainer and chops the garlic, she will inevitably hear a beep from her phone, glance at it and see a picture of a hot pair of baubles with a cryptic note:  “Why aren’t yours like this?”

Women are not bothered by all this foolishness.  After all, we can multi-task.  Don’t think you guys are the only ones with secrets.  Women always have the final say when it comes to any connection with a man.  We know how to say no.

 

 

VIEWS FROM ACROSS THE POND

By Joe Cillo

A HUG IN TIME

A hug is the perfect gift- one size fits all
and nobody minds if you exchange it.
Irvin Ball

A very young man in our Midwest was expelled from school for hugging his teacher.  The administration explained that his gesture of affection was inappropriate.  The young man was 11 years old.

What a sad statement about an adult’s interpretation of a child’s spontaneous impulse.  That young man was not planning to pin a teacher 30 years his senior and twice his size against a wall and ravish her.  He was telling her, in the most wonderful way any human can, that she is a wonderful being to him.

I can think of no sweeter gift to receive than a hug …it says so much more than a kiss or fling between the sheets.  It says, “I love who you are and I want you to know that right now.”  It does NOT say, “You belong to me,” or “you need to live with me,” or “I need your body this minute.”  Not at all.

It does say, “You are so great at this moment in time that I need to hold you close and absorb some of your lovely, inspiring energy.”   What greater gift any anyone give another?

A few years ago, in Edinburgh I as walking down the street with an Englishman who had been such an immense help to me that I was overwhelmed with gratitude. Thank you seemed so lame, so inadequate.   Suddenly, I knew that I had to hug him that very minute to show him that he was like a god to me….and  I did.  I dropped my packages and threw my arms around him and held him tight.

To my embarrassed surprise, he pushed me away.  At first, I was humiliated and angry, but I was puzzled as well.  I had no designs on him.  I had no thoughts of indulging in lascivious behavior in the middle of a busy Edinburgh street.  I was giving him the biggest compliment I knew how to give and he trampled on it.  And then I realized how sad it was that this poor fellow didn’t understand the power of an innocent hug.  He didn’t get that it is one of those human things we can do face to face.  It cannot be done on a cell phone or skype. A facebook post is simply not the same.  It doesn’t have the power…the intensity of feeling…. that a hug can give.

A hug has to be done person to person.  It is a gorgeous moment in time that transforms your world for just a tiny. beautiful second.  It is better than a vitamin, stronger than a shot of whisky and more lasting than any flower I could have pinned in that obtuse guy’s buttonhole.

I attributed his rejection to his being English until that next year when I came to Brighton and went down to the pier bearing a sign “HUG A GRANNY.”  Since everyone on the pier was English, I figured I would stand there, shivering and alone for five minutes and then rollup my invitation and go home.

Not so.

Within seconds, I was hugged by couples, mothers, teen agers, tiny children, a whole school of adolescents and three policemen who assured me I had made their day.  It might have been the sea air that loosened their inhibitions; it might have been that in Brighton we understand the value of a hug.  I am not sure what caused the avalanche of affection I received that memorable day.

What I do know is that I will never be afraid to hug anyone ever again…it is the best way I know to say “What a unique human being you are!” and if that person doesn’t hear me?  Well, I guess, if we were in America, he could expel me from school.  BUT if he lived in Brighton, he would hug me right back.

 

 

Scheherazade by Haruki Murakami — Review

By Joe Cillo

Scheherazade

By Haruki Murakami

The New Yorker, October 13, 2014, pp. 100-109.

Translated from the Japanese by Ted Goossen.

In Haruki Murakami’s revisitation of this ancient classic, a woman the narrator calls ‘Scheherazade’ tells stories to her lover, Habara, “because she wants to.”  She seems to need to talk.  Nothing is at stake, certainly not her life.  Habara was enthralled by the stories because he was “able to forget the reality that surrounded him, if only for a moment.”  They “eased [him] of worries and unpleasant memories,” and he needed this more than anything else.

The lovers don’t call each other by their names.  He doesn’t know hers, and she doesn’t use his.  “She barely spoke during their lovemaking, performing each act as if completing an assignment.”  She would leave at 4:30 to prepare dinner for her family, and Habara would be left to dine alone.  He watched DVDs and read long books.

There wasn’t much else to do.  He had no one to talk to.  No one to phone.  With no computer, he had no way of accessing the internet.  No newspaper was delivered, and he never watched television.  (There was a good reason for that.)  It went without saying that he couldn’t go outside.  Should Scheherazade’s visits come to a halt for some reason, he would be left all alone.

It is a little hard to figure out what this relationship is all about — that is, why it even exists.

Habara had met Scheherazade for the first time four months earlier.  He had been transported to this house, in a provincial city north of Tokyo, and she had been assigned to him as his “support liaison.”  Since he couldn’t go outside, her role was to buy food and other items he required and bring them to the house.

  Apparently, having sex with him was part of her assignment as well.

no vow, no implicit understanding — held them together.  Theirs was a chance relationship created by someone else, and might be terminated on that person’s whim.

So there seems to be some large, mysterious institutional force governing their lives and defining their roles and their functioning within this rather choreographed relationship.  It sounds like he might be under some sort of house arrest, or perhaps he has some disability or injury that he is recovering from.  It is never clear why these two people meet frequently and what motivates them, or why Habara has such a sense of confinement.  It is also unclear why they could not continue to meet even if this nameless, faceless force decided to terminate their “liaison.”

I think this ambiguity, this absence of internal motivations, is important.  Perhaps it is a comment on Japanese society.  I haven’t lived in Japan, so I cannot speak authoritatively on this, but from casual observation, it seems that many Japanese people live very structured lives that are defined by external forces, social expectations, that are a pervasive, overarching presence in their lives.  Thus, much of what they do and how they live is done in order to fulfill these imagined requirements and obligations, rather than from a deeply personal sense of purpose.  People don’t know why they are doing what they are doing, but they know they are supposed to do it — so they do.  What is the “reality that surrounds” Habara that he is so eager to forget, and thus so readily loses himself in Scheherazade’s narratives?  Japanese society.

I once met a young Japanese woman who had freshly arrived in the United States.  I asked her, “Why did you come to America?”  She replied simply, “Freedom.”  I was a little taken aback by that blunt response and all that must have been behind it, but I think it is not an uncommon sentiment among young Japanese women.  Japanese society can be burdensome and confining for young people and this relationship between Habara and Scheherazade, defined and controlled by a powerful unseen force, evokes that sense of invisible boundaries and sweeping tides.

There is nothing resembling spontaneity in this whole story, with the possible exception of their conversations.  The conversations after sex seem to be the only place in their lives where they can interact of their own volition  and participate in life as themselves.

Their sex was not exactly obligatory, but neither could it be said that their hearts were entirely in it. . . Yet, while the lovemaking was not what you’d call passionate, it wasn’t entirely businesslike either. . . to what extent did Scheherazade see their sexual relationship as one of her duties, and how much did it belong to the sphere of her personal life?  He couldn’t tell.

After this ambiguous set up of the relationship between Habara and Scheherazade, the story shifts focus and is taken over by a reminiscence Scheherazade relates from her adolescence that dominates the remainder.  Habara and Scheherazade, the couple, retreat and Scheherazade herself steps forward to claim center stage, specifically, a relationship — or, rather, an obsession — she had in her teens, which impelled her to break into houses — not to steal things, but to satisfy a psychological compulsion.  So it becomes a story within a story, or rather, a substory taking over what had been the main thread.

Scheherazade was obsessed with a boy in her high school class.  She broke into his house (rather easily through the front door with a key hidden under the doormat), and proceeded to go through his things, lie in his bed, smell his clothes, take a couple of innocuous souvenirs, and — very importantly, leave some small mementos of herself behind in inconspicuous places.  She is a rather aggressive girl, but in a very indirect way.  She never approaches the boy himself.  She tries to get close to him through the things he uses and lives with: by occupying the space he occupies, but when he is not there.

she began thinking about what to leave behind.  Her panties seemed like the best choice.  They were of an ordinary sort, simple, relatively new, and fresh that morning.  She could hide them at the very back of his closet.  Could there be anything more appropriate to leave in exchange?  But when she took them off, the crotch was damp.  I guess this comes from desire, too, she thought.  It would hardly do to leave something tainted by lust in his room.  She would only be degrading herself.  She slipped them back on and began to think about what else to leave.

Murakami does not write very well about sex.  He does not seem to understand it.  What I mean is he is detached from visceral passion.  Lust.  He doesn’t want to let himself or any of his characters feel it.  Neither Habara nor Scheherazade feel lust or strong passion in their relationship, and the above passage repudiates lust as a motivating force in Scheherazade’s behavior as a young girl toward the boy in her dreams.  It sanitizes her obsession with the boy.  It desexualizes her smelling his shirt and taking it home, lying in his bed, looking at his hidden pornography.  It makes the girl seem unreal and discredits her obsession with the boy.  If she had stuffed her wet panties under the boy’s pillow and approached him with a dripping cunt that was eager to fuck, it would have given her character more credibility.  She would have to do it in a Japanese way, of course.  Murakami could figure that out.  But Murakami cannot write the story that way.  He wouldn’t know what to do with a girl like that.  Believe me, there are plenty of Japanese girls who are not afraid of lust.

Scheherazade actually has more interaction with the boy’s mother than she does with the boy.  In fact, it seems likely that the boy never became aware of Scheherazade’s interest in him, although it is very clear that his mother did — and she put the kibosh on it.

When my break-ins stopped, my passion for him began to cool.  It was gradual, like the tide ebbing from a long, sloping beach.

The subsiding of Scheherazade’s interest in the boy is as amorphous and inexplicable as her obsession.  But it was the mother’s actions that locked the door and made the house inaccessible to her.  The boy himself was still readily available.  Scheherazade mentions watching him in classes at school and watching him on the soccer field.  She could have approached him in any number of ways.  It leads me to think that this obsession was more about the mother than it was about the boy.  Nothing she did had any impact on the boy, or even reached his awareness.  But the mother knew everything, or at least would soon discover everything, and Scheherazade knew this.  Still she pressed forward in defiant provocation.  It was an attempt at asserting independence — from the mother — through sex.  But it was quashed.  And it appears she never recovered.

Habara and Scheherazade have one more lovemaking session, at Scheherazade’s suggestion, and then she dresses and leaves.  It is not clear why Habara is left ruminating about the possibility — or rather, the certainty — of losing Scheherazade, and the greater specter of losing connection to all women.  Being “deprived of his freedom entirely” was the way he put it.  The invisible puppetmaster that pulls the strings on all of their lives and limits them to a very narrow range of possibilities, seems destined to pull the plug on his tenuous connection to humanity and leave him completely desolate.  This is his greatest worry.  There is nothing in the story to substantiate this fear, any more than there is anything in the story that explains why this affair is even taking place.

In the world Murakami creates these invisible forces that shape and define and limit our lives are both capricious and malevolent.  We can’t see them or influence them, yet we are always under their shadow.  Scheherazade gave a hint to the nature of that unseen, but all powerful governing force: the all knowing and all intrusive Mother, who locks doors and hides keys and crushes all free spirited love and passion.

One can look at this story in two ways as a commentary on the outward forces in Japanese society that define and structure and limit the lives of people, but it also represents a depiction of internal, unconscious forces within the self that restrict and crush the individual spirit.

The original story of Scheherazade was, perhaps, the earliest literary representation of a serial killer.  It remains paradigmatic.  An all powerful king who had felt betrayed and abandoned by one lover takes his revenge on all women thereafter.  Every day he marries a virgin and has sex with her.  The next day he beheads her and marries another.  This continues indefinitely, and endless stream of murdered, slaughtered virgins.  It is a tale of unbounded cruelty and hostility toward women from an original injury by one.  The king is so insecure and so lacking in his own sense of loveability that he feels he must kill each new woman or she will surely betray and abandon him.  This original insecurity and sense of being unloveable did not start with the lover who betrayed him, but rather, started with his mother who was never able to make him feel loved and secure in her love.  His rage was so extreme that he had to kill every woman he came in contact with.  It was the only way he could relate to women.  The betrayal of the first woman who touched off the spree was only the spark that lit a tinderbox that had been waiting for many years.  The injury that she inflamed had been inflicted many years prior, and indeed, goes back to the cradle.  Killing women was palliative, but not curative.  It assuaged his rage temporarily, like a valve letting off steam, but it did not begin to heal the original injury of neglect and abandonment that continued to fester and give rise to new waves of rage that demanded appeasement.  This is why serial killers need to keep on killing.  The mere venting of rage is not a cure.  Sex alone is also not a cure.  Scheherazade had the right idea.

Habara feels that abandonment by Scheherazade is inevitable.  It is only a matter of time.  This expectation was present before he ever met her.  It had nothing to do with anything she did or said.  His fear of being deprived of his freedom entirely is not a fear of external forces — there are no external forces — but rather of internal anxieties and insecurities that might cripple and disable his ability to connect on any level with women.  Scheherazade’s stories eased him of “worries and unpleasant memories” — most likely in relation to women.  He very likely had many of them starting way back with a mother who could not love or make him feel loved, and perhaps abandoned him.  Lust and passion are way too dangerous for a man this fragile.  Deep attachment is the utmost danger, because from an early age he learned that strong attachment leads to devastating disappointment — over and over again.  This is what the story is about.

The original story of Scheherazade ends optimistically, even triumphantly.  Murakami’s contemporary reworking is less optimistic, but has some promising trends.  The original story is a story of healing, through, perhaps, sated rage, coupled with satisfying sex, coupled with a continuing narrative whereby the wounded ruler becomes invested in the future.  Being able to see a way forward that is not an abyss of abandonment and devastation is a very important aspect of the healing process.  That is what Scheherazade’s narratives were able to do for the murderous king.  He was eventually able to fall in love with Scheherazade and make her his Queen.  A decisively optimistic outcome.

In Murakami’s story there is less healing and less optimism.   Murakami’s story ends with gloom and foreboding.  What is positive in Murakami’s tale is that Scheherazade and Habara were able to connect with one another in genuine communication from the heart through the stories she told after sex.  Sex was not the primary avenue of communication for this couple.  Their sex was obligatory and somewhat perfunctory.  The real action between them occurred afterward, when she told him stories of her past.  He took a genuine interest in her life and she found a receptive audience for things she needed to reveal.  This very positive connection aroused Habara’s anxieties of abandonment.  There has not been enough time to effect a healing of his underlying vulnerabilities and injuries, but if they continue, perhaps for A Thousand and One Afternoons, they might achieve a similar outcome to the original tale.